The speaker is frustrated with America and seeks directions to the airport to return to France. Upon meeting a woman, he is drugged and robbed. The woman claims he drugged her first. The story takes a bizarre turn as the speaker witnesses the birth of an unusually large, ugly baby named Jeffy. Years later, on Jeffy's birthday, they celebrate with a unique cake and a mistaken age calculation. Despite the odd events, the speaker sings Jeffy a happy birthday song.