I'm really sorry to hear you're going through this situation. It sounds incredibly stressful, and it's important that you're taking steps to protect yourself. When you're dealing with someone who doesn't respect your boundaries and refuses to accept rejection, it's essential to take clear and decisive action to prioritize your safety and well-being. Here are some steps you can consider:

1. Firm and Clear Communication

You already set boundaries by cutting things off after the first month, which is good. If you haven’t already, make sure to be crystal clear in your communication. If you’re still in contact with him, make it absolutely clear that you are not interested in any further interaction. Let him know that you no longer wish to have a relationship with him and that you do not want him to contact you in any way. Use direct, unambiguous language. For example:

• “I no longer wish to have any contact with you. Please respect my decision and do not reach out again.”

Keep the message simple and avoid any ambiguity or negotiation. Sometimes when people are persistent, giving in to even the smallest conversation can encourage them to keep pushing.

2. Cut Off All Communication

If you haven’t already, block him on all social media platforms, your phone, and any other messaging apps. This may seem like a drastic measure, but it is often necessary when someone is unwilling to respect your boundaries. Blocking him can help prevent him from continuing to contact you, whether through calls, messages, or social media. If he tries to contact you from a different number or account, make sure you don’t engage in any form of communication. No matter how hard it may feel, don’t respond.

3. Keep Your Distance

It’s important to maintain physical and emotional distance from him as well. If he knows where you live or works, consider taking additional precautions to ensure your privacy and safety. If you believe that he might try to show up uninvited, it may be helpful to tell trusted friends or family members about the situation, so they can help monitor the situation and offer support.

4. Document Everything

It’s important to keep a record of all the interactions, messages, and any incidents that make you feel uncomfortable or unsafe. If he continues to push boundaries or harass you, you’ll want this documentation as evidence in case you need to take further action. Save text messages, emails, and any other form of communication. In the event you need to involve law enforcement, having this documentation will be very helpful.

5. Set Boundaries with Others

If you share mutual connections, such as friends or acquaintances, you may want to inform them about the situation. Politely but firmly let them know that you do not want him involved in your life anymore, and ask them not to pass along any messages or updates about you. Make sure that people around you are aware of the situation so they can help enforce your boundaries.

6. Trust Your Instincts

If you feel like he is becoming increasingly obsessive or showing dangerous behavior, don’t hesitate to take more immediate action. If you ever feel that your safety is at risk, trust your instincts and take steps to protect yourself. This may include reaching out to a close friend or family member, contacting local authorities, or getting legal advice. It's better to be cautious, especially if you're feeling threatened.

7. Consider Seeking Support

Dealing with someone who is persistent and disrespectful of boundaries can be emotionally exhausting. It may help to talk to a counselor or therapist to process your feelings and get advice on how to manage the situation. You don’t have to go through this alone. Therapy can provide valuable tools for coping with the emotional stress and offer insight on how to navigate relationships where someone is disregarding your autonomy.

8. Involve Authorities If Necessary

If at any point you feel that your safety is at risk, or if he is stalking you or threatening you, don’t hesitate to contact the authorities. Stalking, harassment, and threats are serious, and you have every right to protect yourself. Consider filing a report with the police or looking into obtaining a restraining order if the behavior escalates.

9. Stay Safe

Your safety and peace of mind are the most important things right now. If you feel threatened or unsafe in any way, seek assistance immediately, whether from loved ones or professionals. You do not owe anyone access to your life, and you have every right to enforce boundaries, especially when it comes to your emotional and physical well-being.

Conclusion

You’re absolutely right to trust your gut and take action to distance yourself from this individual. Be firm, clear, and consistent in enforcing your boundaries. If you feel that you’re not safe, take the appropriate steps to ensure your protection. Your well-being comes first, and you deserve to feel safe and respected in all of your relationships.

Please remember that you don’t have to handle this alone. Reach out to trusted friends, family, or professionals for help and support as you navigate this difficult situation.