It sounds like you are navigating a very challenging and emotional situation, and it's completely understandable to feel lost. Marriage can indeed be complicated, and it often requires ongoing effort, communication, and understanding from both partners. Here are some thoughts and suggestions that may help you as you move forward:

1. Acknowledge Your Feelings:

First and foremost, it's important to acknowledge your feelings of confusion and hurt. It’s normal to feel a mix of hope and frustration during this time. Writing down your feelings in a journal can help you process them more clearly. You might say something like: "I feel hurt when I receive sarcasm instead of support, and it makes me question our connection."

2. Open Communication:

Effective communication is key to resolving issues in a marriage. Consider approaching your husband with a focus on how you feel rather than what he is doing wrong. Use "I" statements to express your feelings without sounding accusatory. For example:

• "I feel sad when our conversations turn sarcastic because I value our connection."
• "I miss the times we enjoyed spending together. Can we talk about how we can get back to that?"

3. Set Boundaries and Expectations:

It might be helpful to discuss boundaries and expectations regarding communication. Let him know that sarcasm and snarky responses make it hard for you to connect. You could say:

• "I understand we both have our frustrations, but I would appreciate it if we could communicate without sarcasm. It feels more constructive to me."

4. Seek Professional Help:

Sometimes, couples can benefit from the guidance of a trained professional. A marriage counselor can provide a safe space for both of you to express your feelings and work through your issues. They can help facilitate productive conversations and teach you effective communication techniques.

5. Reflect on the Separation:

Consider what the separation has taught you about your marriage and yourself. Have your needs changed? Have your perspectives shifted? Reflecting on these questions can help you understand what you truly want moving forward. You might say:

• "During our time apart, I realized I value open communication and support in our relationship."

6. Focus on Self-Care:

While it’s essential to work on your marriage, don’t forget to take care of yourself. Engage in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment outside of your relationship. This can help you maintain a sense of self and provide clarity on your feelings. Activities could include:

• Exercising regularly
• Pursuing hobbies or interests
• Spending time with friends and family

7. Be Patient:

Change takes time, and rebuilding trust and connection after a period of resentment won’t happen overnight. Be patient with both yourself and your husband as you navigate these challenges.

Ultimately, the goal is to create a more understanding and supportive environment for both of you. Remember, it’s okay to seek help, and it’s important to prioritize your emotional well-being. Whatever path you choose, trust your instincts and prioritize open, honest dialogue.