It sounds like you are in a challenging situation, and it's understandable to feel overwhelmed by the one-sided nature of gift-giving in your relationship with your boyfriend's family. Here are some thoughts and suggestions that might help you navigate this issue.

1. Assess the Cultural Norms:

Gift-giving practices can vary significantly between families and cultures. Since your boyfriend's family is very into hosting and celebrations, they may have different expectations around gifts than you’re used to. It might be worth discussing with your boyfriend how his family views gifts. Ask him if he feels there is an expectation for you to bring gifts, especially since you mentioned that his family might not have the same traditions as yours.

2. Open Communication with Your Boyfriend:

This situation can serve as a great opportunity for a conversation with your boyfriend. You might say something like, "I've noticed that I've been bringing gifts to many of your family's celebrations, but I haven't received anything in return. I'm starting to feel a bit uncomfortable with the one-sided nature of it, and I want to make sure we're on the same page about gift-giving." This way, you’re expressing your feelings without making accusations.

3. Joint Gifts:

Considering joint gifts with your boyfriend is a fantastic idea! This could alleviate some pressure on you while still participating in the tradition. You could suggest something like, "How about we team up for gifts going forward? It could be a fun way for us to show appreciation to your family together." This not only makes it more manageable but also involves him in the process, reinforcing your partnership.

4. Set a Budget:

If you decide to continue giving gifts, consider setting a budget for yourself. You mentioned the idea of bringing cheaper items like baked goods or chocolates. These can be thoughtful and appreciated gifts that don’t break the bank. You could say, "This year, I’m thinking of bringing something simple like homemade cookies for Christmas. I hope that’s okay!" This approach can help you feel less burdened financially and still allow you to participate in the celebrations.

5. Evaluate the Relationship Dynamics:

It’s essential to reflect on how this dynamic affects your relationship. If you feel like the giving is one-sided and it’s bothering you, it’s crucial to address it. Healthy relationships involve reciprocity, not just in gifts but in emotional support and effort as well. If this continues to be an issue, it might be worth discussing further with your boyfriend to ensure both of you are comfortable with the relationship’s dynamics.

6. Consider Future Celebrations:

As you approach future celebrations, you might want to gauge the family’s response to your gifts. If they seem to take it for granted, that could be an indication that it’s time to reevaluate how you participate in these events. You can also consider skipping gifts for certain occasions where it feels less appropriate or expected.

Ultimately, the decision to continue giving gifts should align with your comfort level and the nature of your relationship with your boyfriend and his family. Open communication, setting boundaries, and finding a balance that works for you are key. Remember, it’s perfectly okay to prioritize your feelings and financial well-being in this situation.