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Today, I was at the beach with my mom and sister at 10 a.m., and I saw two young girls taking pictures of each other. Suddenly, this older, drunk man, barely able to walk straight, approached them and started blabbering. He said things like, “Wow, with all due respect, you’re gorgeous, so pretty. Can I help take your pictures?” The girls were visibly uncomfortable but politely declined, saying, “Haha, no thank you.” I stood nearby and waited until he left while he kept repeating, “Congratulations, you’re so beautiful.” I was disgusted by the creep. What makes men think they’re being nice when a girl in this situation would just respond with, “Wow, thanks, please take my pictures”? I know he was drunk, but that doesn’t justify his behavior. Even though I’m 10 years older than those girls and generally anxious around teens, something inside me told me to stay nearby in case he tried something. I didn’t know what I would do, being a tiny woman, but I felt like I needed to stay close. Thankfully, he left, still staring at them like an idiot. It just makes me so furious. Girls can’t even have fun in peace without being harassed. Meanwhile, men go about their lives without these fears and feel entitled to act however they want.

a month ago
35

It’s deeply troubling to witness situations like the one you described, where young girls, simply enjoying a moment at the beach, are subjected to unwanted attention and potential harassment. Your feelings of disgust and frustration are completely valid and reflect a broader societal issue regarding the behavior of some men towards women and girls.

First, it’s important to acknowledge the predatory nature of the man's actions. While he may have intended to compliment the girls, his approach was intrusive and made them uncomfortable. As you noted, the girls responded politely, indicating their discomfort by declining his offer. This highlights a crucial point: respecting boundaries is essential. Compliments should never come with expectations or demands, especially from strangers.

In many instances, men often misinterpret their behavior as harmless or friendly when, in fact, it can feel threatening and invasive. This phenomenon is sometimes referred to as the “nice guy syndrome,” where individuals believe that their compliments or offers of help entitle them to a positive response, regardless of the context. This mindset can lead to a disregard for the comfort and autonomy of women. Research has shown that unsolicited attention can lead to feelings of anxiety and fear in women, particularly when the attention comes from a stranger, as was the case here.

Your instinct to stay nearby was a protective response, driven by the awareness of the potential risks that young women face. It’s unfortunate that such instincts are necessary, but they stem from a long history of women needing to be vigilant in public spaces. According to the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN), one in every six American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime. This statistic underscores the reality that many women experience harassment and violence, which can make even innocent situations feel threatening.

Moreover, societal attitudes often fail to hold men accountable for their behavior. The normalization of such interactions contributes to a culture where women are expected to tolerate uncomfortable situations without pushback. As you pointed out, men often go about their lives without the same fears, enjoying their freedom without the anxiety that many women feel. This disparity needs to be addressed through education and awareness, teaching men to recognize the impact of their actions and to respect women's boundaries.

In conclusion, your experience highlights a significant issue that needs to be addressed: the normalization of harassment and the lack of understanding surrounding consent and boundaries. By sharing your story, you contribute to the conversation about these behaviors and their impacts on women’s lives. It’s essential for society to foster an environment where everyone can enjoy public spaces without fear of harassment. Encouraging discussions around respect, consent, and appropriate behavior can help create a safer world for everyone.

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