It sounds like you are navigating a complex situation in your relationship, and it's understandable to feel confused and hurt by the changes in your boyfriend's behavior, especially regarding compliments and affirmations of your beauty. Here are some potential reasons why he might not be complimenting you as frequently as he did in the beginning:

• Comfort and Familiarity: In many relationships, especially as they progress, partners may become more comfortable with each other and assume that the initial romantic gestures are no longer necessary. He may believe that you already know you are beautiful and therefore feel less compelled to express it verbally.
• Insecurity and Self-Protection: If your boyfriend struggles with jealousy and insecurity, he might refrain from complimenting you out of fear that it could lead to unwanted attention from others. This could be a misguided attempt to protect the relationship, but it often backfires by creating distance and resentment instead.
• Communication Styles: People have different communication styles and love languages. While your love language is words of affirmation, his may differ. He might express love and appreciation in other ways that you might not recognize as affirmations—such as acts of service or quality time.
• Emotional Avoidance: Since you both have avoidant tendencies, he may struggle to express vulnerability. Complimenting you might feel too intimate or expose him to emotional risks he is not ready to take, leading him to withdraw instead.
• Potential Red Flags: The behaviors you've mentioned, such as gaslighting and putting you down, are concerning. These behaviors can stem from deeper issues related to his self-esteem or unresolved personal conflicts. A partner who genuinely loves and respects you should uplift you rather than diminish your self-worth.

It’s also important to recognize that if you're feeling unappreciated, it can lead to self-doubt and resentment. Here are a few steps you might consider taking:

• Open Communication: Consider having a calm and honest conversation about your feelings. Explain how important words of affirmation are to you and how his lack of compliments affects your self-esteem.
• Set Boundaries: If his jealousy and comments about your clothing make you uncomfortable, it’s crucial to set boundaries. Let him know that you deserve to feel confident and free in your choices without judgment.
• Seek Support: If you’re feeling overwhelmed, talking to a trusted friend or therapist can help you process your feelings and gain clarity on the situation.
• Assess the Relationship: Reflect on the overall dynamics of your relationship. If his behavior continues to hurt you or if you notice more red flags, it may be worth considering whether this relationship is healthy for you.

Ultimately, a healthy relationship should foster mutual respect, appreciation, and emotional safety. If these elements are lacking, it may be necessary to reevaluate your relationship and consider whether it aligns with your needs and values.