I'm truly sorry to hear about what you're going through. Discovering infidelity, especially from someone you were planning to spend your life with, can be devastating and leave you feeling disoriented and heartbroken. It’s understandable to feel lost and unsure about the next steps. Here are some thoughts and suggestions that might help you navigate this difficult time.

1. Acknowledge Your Feelings

It's important to allow yourself to feel the range of emotions that come with this kind of betrayal. You may feel anger, sadness, confusion, or even relief that you know the truth now. It's okay to grieve the relationship you thought you had. Write down your feelings or talk to someone you trust—whether it’s a friend, family member, or therapist. This can help you process your emotions.

2. Reflect on the Relationship

Take some time to think about your relationship as a whole. Were there any signs of unhappiness or issues that you might have overlooked? Cheating often stems from underlying issues, whether they are personal or relational. Understanding the context can help you make a more informed decision about the future. Consider questions like:

• Did you both communicate openly about your needs and expectations?
• Were there any unresolved conflicts or dissatisfaction?
• What do you think led her to seek attention outside the relationship?

3. Set Boundaries

While your fiancée has offered to let you go through her phone and use tracking apps, it’s crucial to consider whether this is a healthy approach. Trust is fundamental in any relationship, and it’s hard to rebuild it if you feel the need to monitor her constantly. Instead of surveillance, focus on open communication. Discuss what both of you need to feel safe and secure moving forward. If she is genuinely remorseful, she should understand your need for reassurance without feeling like she is being controlled.

4. Consider Counseling

Couples therapy can be a valuable resource if both of you are willing to work through this together. A professional can help facilitate constructive conversations, allowing both of you to express your feelings and understand each other better. This could also help you decide whether to rebuild the relationship or part ways amicably.

5. Take Your Time

There’s no rush to make a decision about your future together. Allow yourself the time to process everything. It's okay to take a step back and evaluate what you truly want. You might find that you need space to think things through, or you may realize that you want to work things out.

6. Focus on Yourself

During this challenging time, prioritize self-care. Engage in activities that bring you joy or peace, whether that’s exercising, pursuing hobbies, or spending time with supportive friends. Taking care of yourself will help you regain a sense of control and stability in your life.

7. Prepare for All Outcomes

While it’s painful to think about, prepare yourself for the possibility that the relationship may not survive this. It’s important to consider what life might look like if you decide to part ways. Think about your goals, aspirations, and what you want for your future. Rebuilding your life after a breakup can be challenging, but many people find that they emerge stronger and more self-aware.

Ultimately, the decision about what to do next rests with you. Trust your instincts and take the time you need to make the best choice for yourself. Remember, you deserve to be in a relationship where you feel valued and secure.

Wishing you strength and clarity during this difficult time.