It sounds like you're experiencing a complex emotional situation that many couples face. Here are several factors that might explain your boyfriend's emotional responses and how they relate to your relationship:

1. Different Emotional Triggers

People often have unique emotional triggers that can vary widely. Your boyfriend may find it easier to empathize with external situations, such as the suffering of orphaned children, because they allow him to express sympathy without feeling personally vulnerable. In contrast, discussing your relationship may bring up feelings of inadequacy or fear of conflict, leading him to shut down emotionally.

2. Fear of Vulnerability

For some individuals, showing emotion in intimate relationships can feel threatening. Your boyfriend might fear that expressing deep emotions about your relationship could lead to confrontation or rejection. This fear can cause him to suppress his feelings when it comes to discussing sensitive topics like the future of your relationship.

3. Emotional Coping Mechanisms

Men, in particular, are often socialized to suppress emotions, especially in romantic contexts. He might have learned to cope with stress and conflict by maintaining a stoic facade. His emotional outpouring in response to external stimuli could be a way for him to process feelings that he finds difficult to articulate in your relationship.

4. Lack of Emotional Awareness

Sometimes, individuals are simply not aware of their emotional state or how to express it. He may not fully understand his feelings regarding your relationship, leading to a disconnect when it comes to expressing them. This can result in emotional outbursts in other contexts where he feels more comfortable.

5. Communication Styles

Different communication styles can also contribute to misunderstandings. If he prefers to discuss issues in a logical manner rather than an emotional one, he may feel that showing emotions is unnecessary or unhelpful. This could explain why he engages with emotional content outside of your relationship but remains composed when discussing your issues.

6. Unresolved Issues

It's possible that there are unresolved issues in your relationship that he finds difficult to confront. If he feels overwhelmed by the prospect of discussing these issues, he may default to emotional detachment as a coping mechanism.

What You Can Do

To address this issue, consider the following steps:

• Open Communication: Have a calm and honest conversation with him about your feelings. Express how his emotional detachment affects you and your relationship.
• Create a Safe Space: Encourage him to express his feelings by creating an environment where he feels safe to be vulnerable. Share your own emotions to model the behavior you hope to see.
• Seek Professional Help: If this remains a persistent issue, couples therapy may provide a safe space for both of you to explore these emotions and learn to communicate more effectively.

Ultimately, understanding and navigating emotional dynamics in a relationship can be challenging, but with open communication and mutual support, it is possible to foster a deeper emotional connection.