It sounds like you're in a tough situation, and it's understandable to feel upset given the circumstances surrounding your boyfriend's gift. Here are some steps you can take to approach this conversation with Chris while being honest about your feelings:

1. Reflect on Your Feelings

Before talking to Chris, take some time to understand your feelings. You mentioned that you are uncomfortable with the pace of the relationship and that a promise ring feels too serious for you right now. Acknowledge that it’s okay to have mixed emotions about the gift. Consider writing down your thoughts to clarify what you want to express.

2. Choose the Right Time and Place

Find a calm and private moment to talk to Chris. Avoid discussing this in a public place or when either of you is feeling rushed or stressed. A quiet environment will allow for a more open and honest conversation.

3. Use “I” Statements

When you start the conversation, use “I” statements to express how you feel without blaming him. For example:

• “I feel overwhelmed by the idea of getting a promise ring right now.”
• “I appreciate the thought behind the gift, but I was hoping for something that reflects my interests more.”

4. Be Honest About Your Disinterest

It’s important to communicate clearly that while you appreciate the gesture, you’re not ready for that level of commitment:

• “I want to be honest with you; I’m not comfortable with promise rings or moving that fast in our relationship.”
• “I hope you understand that I want to take our time and enjoy getting to know each other better.”

5. Address the Gift Specifically

You can gently address the ring itself and your feelings about it:

• “I know you said it was $200, but I found similar rings online for much less. I just want to make sure we’re being honest with each other.”
• “I would love to have something that represents our relationship, but maybe something that fits my personality better?”

6. Acknowledge His Feelings

Recognize that Chris may feel hurt or disappointed by your reaction. Validate his feelings by saying:

• “I can see that you put a lot of thought into this, and I appreciate that.”
• “I want to make sure we’re both happy in this relationship.”

7. Suggest Alternatives

Consider proposing alternatives that might work for both of you. For example:

• “Maybe we can pick out something together that represents our relationship in a way we both love?”
• “How about we focus on experiences together, like a fun date or a trip, rather than gifts?”

8. Be Prepared for His Reaction

Understand that Chris may need time to process your feelings. Be patient and open to discussing it further if needed. It’s important to maintain open lines of communication.

Conclusion

Ultimately, the goal is to communicate your feelings honestly while respecting his intentions. Relationships thrive on understanding and compromise, so addressing this issue thoughtfully can strengthen your bond in the long run.

Remember, it’s perfectly okay to want to take things at your own pace. Good luck with your conversation!