Teresa Vickie2 months agoI’m feeling really lost and unsure about my relationship with my boyfriend (M26) after discovering that he hid something significant from me (F23). We’ve been together for two months, and a few days ago, he revealed something that has shaken my trust. Before we started dating, he had a casual relationship with someone, and they slept together three times. Just a week before we met, he found out that she was pregnant, and a few weeks later, she had an abortion. He didn’t tell me about any of this, and I found out by accident while checking for a parcel. He mentioned that the tracking information was in deleted messages, and that’s when I stumbled upon a conversation with her. When I confronted him, he explained that he was afraid to share this with me because he knew about my own traumatic abortion experience earlier this year. He thought it might upset me and change how I felt about him. He also said he was shocked by the situation himself and didn’t know how to bring it up, but he claimed he would have told me if she had decided to keep the baby. What’s troubling me is that they’ve been messaging each other about once a week throughout our relationship. From what I saw, their conversations weren’t flirty—mostly arguments—but he never mentioned me at all. I feel like he could have handled the situation better, such as ignoring her messages. Their communication seemed to end when he returned £100 to her, which she had originally given him as a gift but later insisted on getting back. I feel like he broke my trust by not being upfront about something so significant from the start, especially since they were still in contact. I’m struggling to determine if I’m overreacting or if this is a major red flag. I care about him deeply, but this situation has left me feeling uncertain about our relationship. Any advice would mean a lot.18
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Teresa VickieTeresa Vickie