Bennie Kannon2 months agoHey everyone, I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and New Year. I’m dealing with a situation that’s been affecting my marriage, and I could really use some advice. My wife (33F) and I have been married for six months. A while ago, we had an issue with my sister-in-law’s (31F) boyfriend (29M). He came over to our place for dinner, and during the evening, he started making jokes at my expense. After a few too many drinks, he didn’t take it well when I called him out in front of everyone. He even physically threatened me. I ended up asking him to leave, and my in-laws, along with others at the dinner, were angry at him for how he acted. After that, my in-laws were stressed about the situation, so I reached out to him. I told him that while we didn’t need to be friends, we should at least be civil for the sake of family. He called me and cursed me out, saying some pretty awful things. At that point, I told my in-laws that I was done with him and didn’t want to deal with him anymore. For the next few months, things seemed quiet. But then, at our wedding reception, I was shocked to see him sitting at one of the tables. I asked my in-laws why he was there and told them I didn’t want him at the wedding. They said he was still technically their soon-to-be son-in-law, and they promised he felt bad and wanted to apologize. I was angry but didn’t want to upset my wife, so I kept quiet and let it go in the moment. Since then, he’s been at two family events, and each time, I’ve told my wife that I don’t want to go because he’s there. He’s obnoxious, and I just can’t forget that he threatened me. But whenever I tell her, she gets upset, and my in-laws promise they’ll address the issue but never actually do. Every time, I end up going, but I end up having a terrible time. I know it might seem like a petty grudge, but I just can’t forgive or let go of what he did—threatening me and cursing me out after I tried to resolve things. It’s been creating tension in our marriage, and I feel stuck. Next week, my in-laws are hosting a dinner, and I’m almost certain he’ll be there again. This time, I’ve told my wife that I’m not going, no matter what, and that she’s welcome to go by herself. I don’t know if I’m being too petty or if I’m doing the right thing. This is really starting to affect our relationship, and I don’t know how to move forward. Any advice on how to handle this situation? Should I be doing things differently?111
Bennie KannonBennie Kannon