Roderick Karina2 months agoI (25M) have been in an incredible relationship with my girlfriend (23F) for a few months now, and it's honestly been amazing. We've become completely head over heels for each other, and the love I feel for her is unlike anything I’ve ever experienced. I trust her with every part of me, and I’ve never felt so connected to someone. But recently, I’ve been feeling this overwhelming sense of inadequacy whenever we’re together, and it’s hard to shake. One of the reasons for this is that I feel like I’m falling behind in life compared to people my age. I’m not making excuses, but the circumstances I’ve faced have made things harder for me. Still, I’m pushing through and doing my best to make the most of what I have. But every time I’m with her, this feeling creeps up on me. She’s such an amazing person, and I can’t help but think she deserves better than what I feel I can give her. I do smoke weed, and while I know it’s something I need to work on, it’s been something I’ve used for my ADHD. The prescribed meds don’t work well for me, and cannabis has been a way to manage it. But I also know it’s something that I should cut back on, especially because I want to be better for myself—and for her. I’ve been smoking less when we’re together, not because I feel pressured, but because I truly want to make progress on it. I’ve taken her out on dates, shown her how much I appreciate her, and I know she feels loved. She’s said so herself. But for some reason, it never feels like it’s enough. I constantly feel like I should be doing more or being better, and this weight of inadequacy is starting to affect me. I know I’m working hard to give her the best, but it’s hard not to feel like I’m not living up to the standards I’ve set in my mind. I know I need to stop overthinking and just be present in the relationship, but these thoughts keep holding me back. I’m so lucky to have her, and I don’t want to let these feelings of inadequacy ruin what we have. I want to be the best partner I can be, but at times it feels like no matter what I do, it’s not enough. I’m working on improving myself—cutting down on smoking, becoming more self-assured, and really investing in us. But I need some advice on how to get past these feelings and learn to accept that I’m enough as I am. How do I stop doubting myself and just focus on building the relationship and the life we’re creating together?146
Roderick KarinaRoderick Karina