Jensen Lesley2 months agoI’m a 28-year-old woman, and my fiancée is 31. We’ve been together for two and a half years and got engaged in August. My partner has a long history of having a strained relationship with her parents, which tends to get worse every time she enters a new relationship. Unfortunately, this issue has escalated in the past few months, especially since we got engaged. Things came to a head during a heated argument between my partner and her mom about the location of our wedding. This caused a period of no contact between them for a few months. Last year, when we told her parents that we would be spending Christmas with my family, and planned to visit them for New Year’s, we were completely iced out. They didn’t speak to us until alcohol was involved in the evening. Now, we’ve changed the wedding location to be closer to them, which feels like we’ve given in, and it has left me feeling a lot of anger. My question is how to move forward in a relationship with someone whose parents treat her terribly, while also being expected to be involved with them. I want to be supportive, but I feel like it’s unfair for me to keep participating in family events with them, especially when they’ve treated my partner so unkindly. Is it unreasonable to ask my partner not to include me in family gatherings with her parents, while not requiring her to cut them off entirely? Is that a fair request?123
Jensen LesleyJensen Lesley