Gemma Astona month agoMy husband (28M) and I (24F) have been married for two years. We recently bought our first home, and while it's been exciting, we’ve been facing some challenges. He’s always had issues with his temper and attitude. He’s broken things and punched holes in walls, but what frustrates me the most is when he calls me during his workday. I’m always happy to talk to him, but there have been countless times when he takes out his anger from work on me. His tone, the way he speaks—it happens so often, and I take it, a lot. On top of this, my mom has been showing signs of memory loss. We think it might be alcohol-induced dementia because she’s been drinking heavily for over 30 years. But it’s been getting worse, fast. Yesterday, she went in for an MRI to see what’s happening with her brain. We won’t get results until the 29th, so we’re in this three-week waiting period, just wondering if she has the same horrible disease that took my grandmother. I was extremely close to my grandmother, and the last time I saw her, she didn’t even know my name, which was devastating. I’m terrified my mom will go through the same thing. So how does this tie back to my husband? Well, right now, I’m not able to be “perfect” for him. My world is falling apart. I don’t have a relationship with my father or anyone else in my family. My mom has been my only support, even though she wasn’t perfect either. She’s the only person I have to lean on, and I’m scared I might lose her. This morning, I got up and got into the bath (he knew this before he left for work). He called me afterward and asked me to Venmo him money for gas. My phone was in the other room, and I told him no because I had just gotten into the tub. He got upset, hung up on me, and I immediately started crying because it felt like he didn’t care. I called him back, and he yelled at me, saying I was being “rude” first. Maybe I did sound irritated, but the situation was annoying, and I didn’t think I deserved to be treated like that. I reminded him that he often takes his anger out on me for no reason, and he responded by saying, “Just because your mom is sick doesn’t mean you can treat me however you want.” I don’t know what to say to that. I just want some understanding and grace right now. I’m in such a bad headspace, and I don’t feel supported.157
Gemma AstonGemma Aston