Milka Milevaa month agoI’m a 24-year-old woman, and I recently experienced something deeply troubling in my relationship with my boyfriend, who is 27. We both work night shifts, but he typically goes in and gets off earlier than I do. Yesterday, I woke up to start my “day,” and he was already up. When my alarm went off, I didn’t get up right away because I wanted to take a moment to gather myself. He came into the room and asked if I was going to get up in time to cook, or if he needed to make food for himself. I politely asked him to give me just a minute. A few minutes later, I got up and went to the bathroom. While I was washing my face, I heard his phone playing YouTube videos in the kitchen, but then I noticed the bathroom door slowly opening. I was startled and just stared wide-eyed as he walked in. I didn’t mean anything by my reaction, but he became upset and started yelling at me, saying I should always greet him with enthusiasm and good energy. He was cursing at me and expressing his frustration about my “attitude.” When I came out of the bathroom, I saw he was making himself food. I asked him why he was doing that since he knew I was planning to cook. This led to another outburst from him, where he criticized my attitude again. Frustrated, I started talking over him, trying to express my side, and that’s when he slapped me across the face. He told me I needed to learn to listen and not talk over him. We’ve been together for three years and lived together for two, and while we have had physical altercations in the past, they were mutual pushing incidents early in our relationship. We both agreed to avoid physical confrontations after that. This slap felt completely out of the blue and unacceptable. After the incident, we had a heated argument, and I stood my ground, expressing that I was done with the relationship. He drove off but then returned and insisted we “talk it out.” He locked us in the room together and tried to be playful, which felt inappropriate given the circumstances. He attempted to spin the situation, claiming he only reacted that way because he was frustrated and felt I wasn’t listening. I told him that was manipulation and there was no excuse for his behavior. He then mentioned that he needed to start “protecting his energy” and left again, saying he would never do it again. I’m feeling confused and hurt, and I’m questioning whether we can move forward from this. Has anyone else experienced something similar? I would appreciate any advice or perspectives on how to handle this situation.138
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