Jela Marina month agoI’m feeling utterly heartbroken and lost right now. Just yesterday, my fiancé (23) and I (22) had a significant fight about moving out together, which ultimately led to our breakup. We’ve been together for almost a year, and I thought we were on the same page about taking this next step. Recently, my mom sent us a rental listing, and my fiancé expressed interest in checking it out. I rearranged my work schedule to make it happen, but when the time came, he admitted that he was scared to move out. I tried to reassure him that everything would be okay, but I couldn’t help but feel hurt and rejected. It felt like he didn’t want to take that step with me. During our conversation, he opened up about his anxiety, saying he didn’t feel supported. I apologized and explained that my intention was to support him while also expressing my desire to build a life together. As we talked, he kept pushing the move-out date further away, which frustrated me. I reminded him that we had been planning this for months, and if he wasn’t ready to move out with me, I would have to consider moving on since I want to create a future with someone. He expressed his fears about missing his parents (he’s an only child) and worries about potential conflicts between us. I empathized with his anxieties, as I deal with anxiety too, but I encouraged him to think logically about the situation. Eventually, he suggested moving out by March 1st, and while I agreed, I couldn’t shake the feeling of disappointment from our earlier conversation. Despite my upset feelings, we attended his work party and enjoyed the day together. However, later on, he asked if I wanted to break up, and I said no but expressed my concern that he might never be ready to move out with me. He assured me he didn’t want to lose me. Then, the next day, everything changed. He threatened to break up with me, saying he didn’t feel supported and that I was causing him anxiety. I apologized and suggested we talk things through. I even left class on my first day back to drive to him. But just ten minutes before I arrived, he texted me that he couldn’t do this anymore, blocked me and my family on everything, and cut off communication. His mom later told me that my ultimatum made him rethink our entire relationship. I’m left feeling confused and devastated. His friend reached out to say that he loves me tremendously but needs time to think. I’m unsure of what to do next. If he reaches out again, should I take him back? This isn’t the first time his anxiety has interfered with our plans, like traveling, and I’ve been trying to be understanding. Yet, he insists that I’m not supportive enough. I’m at a loss and just want to figure out what to do next. Any advice would be appreciated. 😔131
Jela MarinJela Marin