Robbie Carlenea month agoI’ve hugged my parents, siblings, and a friend when he was really upset, but I tend to be very guarded and have a hard time noticing what’s going on in those moments. Once, when I hugged my mom, I suddenly remembered when I was small and still loved being hugged. It made me feel sad that I couldn’t feel that way anymore. The sensation felt almost like a muscle that had been tense for a long time, now too stiff to fully relax. When I hugged my upset friend, he was shaking, and I was taken aback by his emotional state. It made me feel sad for him. My sister is always cold, and I often joke that she feels like she’s vibrating when I hug her. Last night, I had a strange dream. In it, I was in love with someone but couldn’t do anything about it. He came up to me and hugged me. I couldn’t see him well at first, but when he said something, I realized it was him. The hug lasted a long time, and I started to feel his body moving with mine. It’s hard to describe, but it felt like his self was in that body, and I could feel the energy of it next to mine, almost like being near a power generator or a car running but not driving yet, where you can feel the hum of it. It makes me feel kind of silly because it was just a dream, and neither of our bodies actually existed. But I can’t shake the feeling, and I’m having trouble waking up and starting my day after experiencing that. I’m just wondering what it actually feels like to hug someone you love.131
Robbie CarleneRobbie Carlene