Jan Vladimira month agoI (22M) have been in a relationship with my girlfriend (23F) for about nine months, and lately, I've been feeling uncomfortable with some of her remarks regarding my family's wealth. My family is fortunate and quite comfortable, but we pride ourselves on being humble and not flaunting our financial situation. While our house is larger than average, it’s not excessively extravagant. My girlfriend comes from a middle to lower-class background, living with her mother, and I have never had an issue with that. I appreciate her background and have never made any comments about it. However, she has made several comments about my family's wealth that have left me feeling uneasy. For instance, around Christmas, she asked me if "my mother uses my father's money to buy his presents." This struck me as inappropriate because my parents share their finances as a married couple; it’s not about his money or her money, but rather their money as a unit. Additionally, I recently received my mom's old car because my previous one was no longer reliable. My parents were leasing their vehicles and needed to get new ones, so they bought my mom a new car and gave me her old one. My girlfriend was aware of this situation. Yet, she commented, "Imagine getting a new phone and car for Christmas," which felt dismissive of the context and the hard work my parents put into their lives. I’m struggling with how to respond to her comments. I don’t want to make her feel bad about her situation, but at the same time, I feel uncomfortable with her remarks about my family’s financial decisions. I’m not sure how to address this without causing tension in our relationship.1957
Jan VladimirJan Vladimir