Antony Erickaa month agoMy fiancée (32F) and I have been together since March 2024, living together since May, and engaged since July. While things have been moving quickly, we’re both very much in love and everything has felt easy. We’ve had our usual disagreements, but our communication has been strong, and we’ve built a great partnership, from managing household responsibilities to discussing our future and even getting a puppy. We talk about marriage, kids, and our future together. However, there are some things that have been bothering me, and I’ve recently discovered something that’s left me uncertain: When she was living in her own apartment, we were packing some of her things to move them to mine, and I found a bag full of sex toys. While I personally enjoy them, she had never mentioned this to me, and I was caught off guard. She explained that they weren’t hers, but were left behind by an ex (a FWB) and that she threw them out. I didn’t fully believe this story, but I tried to let it go. I have a history of jealousy and overthinking due to trust issues from my last relationship, which ended with cheating after seven years, so it’s hard for me to not dwell on things. From what I know, my fiancée has only had casual relationships or FWBs in the past couple of years, nothing serious. Yesterday, I decided to check her laptop, where I knew the password was her birthday, and I wanted to investigate further regarding the sex toys. I searched her email and found something disturbing: an ad she posted in 2022 on a site similar to eBay, where she was looking for a job. Someone reached out to her through that site, and the messages were concerning—they were discussing sex for money. The conversation was deleted, and I couldn’t see what she replied, but it’s clear that there was some sort of exchange. When I confronted her in the past about things I’ve found, she has been defensive and hasn’t been fully open with her answers. I’ve asked her before if there’s anything in her past that I should worry about, and she has always told me there’s nothing, which makes me doubt what I’ve discovered now. I love her, and I trust her in the present, but after finding this, I’m questioning whether I can see her as my future wife or the mother of my children. I don’t want to break up with her, but I also need to understand if this really happened. I’m unsure how to approach this conversation with her. Any advice on how to move forward and handle this situation would be greatly appreciated.131
Antony ErickaAntony Ericka